Now the curtain-raiser to the new football season has whimpered off into the dullest recesses of our memories, it’s time to reflect back on EURO 2016, and ponder a while over what it has taught us.
- It’s possible to finish 3rd in your Group without winning a match; and go on to win the tournament.
- Gareth Bale is in fact Shogun reincarnate (you’re not a teenager if you don’t have to Google ‘Shogun’).
- No one likes the Russian fans.
- The Irish will drink your bars dry…then change tyres on a car for a stranger, sing a lullaby to your child, and tidy up after themselves.
- Everyone loves the Irish.
- Everyone hates the Russians.
- A player can fail to make a single appearance in the tournament…but that won’t stop fans from making the most memorable song of the tournament about his (alleged) attacking prowess.
- The Welsh and English love each other really (when dealing with the Russians).
- Everyone hates the Russians.
- The Final really can be the dullest game of the tournament.
- Ronaldo may have a heart (or an acting career – when he hangs up his boots), but the ‘Tears of a Clown’ still belong to Gazza.
- Millions of football fans are desperately trying to figure out how Iceland do ‘that clap’ so well (and are failing still).
- Everyone loves Iceland (not just good old Mum).
- Everyone hates the Russians.
- We must have missed the English team’s open-topped bus tour.
- Woy got it badly wong.
- Everyone loves a trier (maybe next time, England?)
- Everyone hates the Russians.
- Plastic chairs have a distinct lack of aerodynamic properties
- Harry Kane needs a guide to set pieces.
- Watching the Germans or the French lose never loses its appeal.
- English fans have a new hatred of the Welsh.
- The value of Sterling plummeted during the tournament.
- England have no Hart.
- ITV’s studio in Luxembourg enabled viewers to squint slightly, tilt their heads and just about see the Eiffel Tower.
Anyone fancy a trip to Russia for the World Cup?